Wedding rant

I know you might never guess it, but weddings are a huge part of my life.  (catch sarcasm, NOW).  I have witnessed countless weddings, and although each is different and lovely in it's own way I am distinctly aware that being such a consistent observer has left me with a pronounced and ripening opinion as to what a wedding ceremony "should be."  (I know, there is arrogance in this, right?... but there is no denying that the more weddings I witness, the more I am fine-tuning my own aesthetic preferences... it's just a fact of life... I never like to be arrogant without also being defensive - it's what I call the "super sexy combo.") 

For example: The Wedding Ceremony.  

For many people the ceremony with all it's flowers and candles and runners is a sacred ritual of uniting two lives.  For this reason the ceremony is traditionally considered "the point", and many customs: the unity candle, the vows, the parent vows, a sermon, special songs, prayers, communion, are incorporated. Over the past few years I have watched as wedding ceremonies have shifted from being the focal point to being more peripheral, and I have found this shift refreshing.  

Here's the thing: when the focus shifts away from the ceremony, it tends to land nearer to a little thing called "everything else", aka "the reception." Picture this: you are getting ready to go to a wedding.  You get all dressed up - you put on the perfume - you get the gift ready - and you get to the church a little late (oh you KNOW you do... I see you every time) and sit through a ceremony for an hour.  It's sweet, it's important, and you are probably bored out of your mind and feeling incredibly guilty for this emotion.  The ceremony ends, and what do you feel like doing?  For me, sitting through what feels similar to church is not usually the best party aphrodisiac.  Of course, some weddings are intentionally more quiet - the rhythm of a lengthy ceremony fits the essence of some couples perfectly - but some couples really want their wedding to be a celebration; some couples want to party.  

In my opinion the most successful weddings are the weddings that allow the energy of the guests, the wedding budget and the couple's time to focus on what is important.  It's like there is a huge "wedding funnel", and as the lucky couple you can funnel the energy anywhere you want - but what I am guessing is that most couples don't consider that the "traditional" ceremony takes a lot of energy - from them, from the guests, from the day.  If the ceremony is where the couple wants the focus: then by jove make it long and make it emotional.  But if the celebration and post-ceremony is where the money and expectation and time is being spent: then make space for the focus to be there!  

Alright... that's my wedding rant for the day.  

And all the people said AMEN.    

Comments

[Meghan]

Oh you know where my money would go... partaaaaaaay